Week 2 – Day 7 of work
So this is the second week of work. I managed to get through clinic yesterday afternoon, child protection work this morning and an impromptu consultation with a parent. Once again I decided to get lunch outside, to get fresh air and clear my head.
I decided to give Cafe Nero a miss this week. Instead I walked past Kobe Sushi which looked slick and stylish and an welcome escape from my inner turmoil. I was talking to my sister last week or maybe the week before that, I forget now, and she told me that she was not sure if it had hit her or not. I remember telling her that it would not be quite like a tsunami but a constant ebb and flow. I said there will be events that will trigger these feelings of loss and despair for the rest of our lives – marriage, babies, other significant family events. For me today – I was thinking about how to arrange an up and coming ‘life event’ and I came across the Oxo tower and then I was taken back to the time when I last went to the South Bank. And then I was accosted by waves and waves of sadness. I could do nothing but take my glasses off and place my face in my hands and silently mourn our loss. I was once again assailed by the injustice of it all and my thoughts gathered in a little grey cloud above my head. This little grey cloud of sadness is still hovering over my head – it followed me to Halfords and Boots (two Christmas gifts bought in a hurry – even though I am not sure whether it is appropriate but I wanted to bring some Christmas cheer to somebody, even though I do not quite feel it myself) and settled over my table for one as I hid myself in the restuarant.
On a lighter note – the place looks nice! It had previously been a noodle bar that I would occasionly dash out to at lunchtime. I cannot remember paying much attention to the decor but today – if only to distract myself – I was all eyes (and ears!). Their was pleasant jazz/lounge music playing and the waitor and waitresses were sweet and attentive.
I ordered my Japanese green tea. It was of course, lovely and refreshing and it calmed me down somewhat. I loved the green colour of the seats. They are firm but comfortable. The place was practically empty – I think most be people were out in the mad rush of last minute Christmas shopping.
I had developed a craving for sushi and therefore the Rainbow Chirashi – seemed the perfect thing to fill my stomach and lighten my mood. I am still not quite sure what I ate – but it tasted delicious. It was so pretty to look at too!
So that was lunch, then a hop and skip back to the office and back to dictation, paperwork, phone calls and social workers.